The big media news inside the Beltway today was the brouhaha over The Washington Post planning, and then canceling, dinner parties that promised deep-pockets lobbyists access to Obama administration insiders, members of Congress and even the Post’s own editorial staff.

Bloggers across the political spectrum condemned the idea; the Post’s ombudsman called the story a “public relations disaster“; the paper’s executive editor said he never would have let his staff participate; publisher Katharine Weymouth reaffirmed her commitment to “our journalism and our integrity“; and the Obama administration had to answer questions about whether it had been invited to the “salons” and agreed to attend.

Everyone agrees, the Post blew it big time and will have an ethical cloud over its work for quite a while. Now that we have all that serious talk out of the way, let’s have a little fun by imagining what kind of deals the Post might offer next.

Plenty of people are letting their imaginations run wild over at Twitter. There is even a new hashtag (#WaPodeals) to make all of the wisecracks (including the predictably vile ones from lefties) easily searchable. Here’s a family-friendly sampling:

• For $10 million none of the Post’s staff will say anything negative about Sarah Palin for a day.
• For $7,000, David Broder will write about the need for more bipartisanship. (Who are we kidding? He’ll do it for an ice-cream cone.)
  
• For $10,000, WaPo will hire and fire Dan Froomkin again and let you watch.
• For $1,250, Al Kamen will consult the Obamas on their Christmas card before it goes to the printer.
  
• For $25,000, we’ll have [Bob] Woodward write a book on you. For $250,000, it will actually be complimentary.
• Just $100,000 gets you a Date Lab with the governor/member of Congress of your choice.
• For $10,000, George Will will wear jeans for a day.
  
• For $30,000, Richard Cohen will fly to your house and yell at those annoying kids on your lawn.
• Hey, maybe for $20, WaPo will let me RickRoll its editorial board.
• How much does it cost to get my paper delivered before I leave for work?

Here’s my contribution: For $1, the Post will hire the worst “conservative” blogger it can find as a token to counter the boatload of liberals already on the blogging staff.

Share your ideas in the comments section.

The Post scandal also spawned a great new word on Twitter (at least its new to me) — “presstitutes.” Any other words you would like to suggest for the media lexicon? Post them in the comments, too.

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